21/03/2022 By acomputer 600 Views

My girlfriend can't cum

First of all, I would like to emphasize that pleasure is, in the field of sexuality as everywhere else, something spontaneous. The more we try to control it, the more we inhibit it. You say, “We've tried several caresses and positions, with no success, and she can't come on her own either. Which means you're putting some good will into trying to get her to come. So she senses that you're just waiting for her orgasm and, for her part, "she tries to make it happen" instead of letting things happen spontaneously when she won't try to reach it. Here we find ourselves faced with the first paradox which maintains, in spite of you, a vicious circle of inhibition. In sexuality, it is important to take what comes and share it as well as possible with no other goal than the present moment.

If we reflect on another aspect of the question, we should know that, according to studies and surveys that have been carried out on women's sexuality*, nearly eight out of ten (78%) sexually active French women admit to having already had difficulty enjoying. The absence of orgasm significantly affects women: one in four (26%) declares that they have not enjoyed during their last sexual intercourse. The fact is that this is sometimes badly perceived by men who can feel hurt by it... and that 59% of women have already faked it, including 67% of young women under 30, when they feel that their partner is doing efforts in this direction.

Ma copine n'arrive pas à jouir

Also read: I can't have an orgasm

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— ErgoPlus Wed Jun 03 20:00:16 +0000 2015

And then how can you be sure that this disillusionment that you feel in her is not linked to the feeling that she would have of disappointing you and the idea of feeling unable to meet your expectations? The pleasure of sharing for two and loving complicity are the two ingredients that can allow everyone to let go. The pleasure then has the possibility of manifesting itself with a variable intensity according to the moment and the state of relaxation of each one. If pleasure and orgasm always had the same intensity and the same predictability, it would become monotonous!

* Ifop study for Online Séduction, carried out by self-administered online questionnaire, from January 18 to 21, 2019, with a sample of 1,210 people, representative of the French population aged 18 and over.